It IS Hard.

It’s hard. No, it’s not just hard, it’s really hard. To let go. You know, any usual day, I don’t feel I have a mega challenge with letting go, but today, I am. Maybe because I feel sentimental, or maybe it’s because I really did have fun back then, but no matter how you cut the cake – it is truly difficult letting go of people from your past who prevent you from growing in your walk with Christ. You know the people I’m talking about? In your not-so-Christ-centered days, these people will drive you to the bar and rehash the entire night with you, but won’t go near church with a ten foot pole – so asking them to rehash an encounter you had with Jesus, is just out of the question.

The Reason: These people are a part of your life, or were a part of your life. They may have been a shoulder to cry on, a drinking buddy, a partner in crime, an old boyfriend or girlfriend, a former hook up, a party pal, an accomplice, former skipping-school friend, an old roommate….the list goes on. Bottom line – they become a part of your history, and this is what makes it truly challenging to move forward without them. You want them desperately to be a part of your life now and moving forward, but you know it just isn’t going to be healthy for either one of you. Why? Because when you get around each other, you don’t bring out the Christ in each other, in fact, Jesus may be miles away when you two get together. Does any of this sound familiar?

Now, I’m not saying go through your roll-a-dex or Facebook account and de-friend everyone who doesn’t text or email you scriptures, or pray with you, or come to church with you. No. What I mean here is, when we grow in Christ – as we mature with the Lord – there are some times these people, who hold a special place in our heart, who just don’t share our love for Christ. In fact, it might be safe to say, they love the “old you” more than they love our Savior Jesus Christ. These people can usually take us right back to our “old self” with one phone call, or only hanging out one time, it may not take much to give Satan that foot hold. These people mean well, and we want so very badly for them to love Christ just as much as we do – but the reality is, they just aren’t seeing Him the way we see Him. And it hurts. A lot. It may make our hearts physically hurt.

I have one of these folks in (or out) of my life, and I can tell you, it’s tough. Sure, we argue like friends do, and get into intense discussions about faith….I pray for this person deeply, all the time. I love this person, and care for them very much. However, for the last 7 years or so, it continues to hit me square in the face, I cannot rescue this person from the choices they make; I cannot save them; I cannot stay in relationship with this person because they have a unique power (which I give them) to drag me right back into my “old self” with such a careless attitude. I offered myself as an instrument of sin with this person, and ignored the Holy Spirit promptings within me to stop. I was having “fun” with this person back in the old scene. Then after a night of fun, I would wake up feeling incredibly empty. I can assure you, this feeling of “emptiness” has only amplified and increased over time, especially the more I grow in my walk with Christ, the emptiness after time with this person intensifies and causes me deep confusion. It hurts. It hurts because I want so badly for this person to see how much Jesus Christ loves them; it hurts because I want so badly for them to just surrender EVERYTHING to God and let Jesus be their Lord; it hurts because I often feel like I care about this person more than they care about themself.

For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin, - Romans 6:6, NIV

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; - Ephesians 4:22, NIV

Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices, - Colossians 3:9, NIV

The old is gone and the new is here! I have learned that these people who come into our lives for a season, have served their purpose in our lives. If they are causing me to stumble, I have to (gasp!) – let go. Even as I write that, I take a deep breath, because it is so hard. My new definition for having “fun” on Friday and Saturday nights, is not the same as it was 7 years ago – however, for these people, the definition of “fun” has not changed, it fails to honor God. When you have a desire to honor God, and these dear people do not, it is difficult to grow in relationship with this person. Therefore, we end up sacrificing our walk with the Lord, for relationship with these people – and I tell you, this is not a sacrifice we can afford to make. Why? Because God wants better for us than that, God wants better for these people in our lives too – but they need to realize that, and we can’t be their Savior, they already have a man who died on a Cross for them to know how much they are loved as their Savior.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. – 1 Thessalonians 5:11, NIV

He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it. – Titus 1:9, NIV

But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness. – Hebrews 3:13, NIV

Friends, let’s encourage each other as His word says; let us not allow Satan to use these dear people in our lives to drag us back into sin or an old lifestyle we have been broke from; Jesus already paid the price for our sins, and for us to flee from our life of sin to follow Him. It’s like an ex-relationship, why do you want to go back? Because when things are going great with a new relationship, some times that thought creeps in, “I did have fun back then! I kind of want to go back to that, just for a little bit….” Because it feels comfortable. A life with Christ will be challenging, and it will have joy, but don’t let the challenges convince you to go back to an “old life” because it was comfortable. You are a NEW creation in Christ! (2 Corinthians 5:17) Don’t just believe in God, believe God! We can stand together as brothers and sisters in Christ and overcome the temptations to fall back into our old lifestyles. The Christ in us can defeat the enemy. If you need to let go of these lost dear people in your life who will drag you back to sin, let go. Trust me, it’s not easy, but it’s better to let go and know you are being encouraged to grow in Christ, than to hang on to these old relationships and be encouraged to fall back into sin. I know you move forward and defeat the enemy! I believe in the God who is in you!

Praying for you my dear friends! It may be hard, in fact, Christ never said it would be easy, He just said it would be worth it!

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KB