Just Tell Her

Today I had the fun experience of getting to do hair! Yes, for those of you laughing, and if you know me, I love to get in a girl huddle and do hair and make-up! And I'm sure you are already wondering what does hair have to do with God? (For those of you who are super spiritual, you are already thinking of this verse: Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. - Luke 12:7, NIV ....nice job! I kid, I kid....) Well, I had the opportunity to do hair for a bunch of high school girls who were performing in musicals for their respective high school theater department. It was great fun! There was everything from the Sound of Music, Hairspray, Grease, Paper Moon, South Pacific, and Bugle Boy.

I saw her from a distance, and I could immediately tell. She was the girl who every girl in high school wanted to be, you know the one I'm talking about? She was absolutely beautiful, her long straight blond hair, flawless tan skin, big blue eyes, thin and dressed with the trends. Her girlfriends swarmed her and followed her everywhere, pouring compliments on her as I did her hair. All the high school guys couldn't take their eyes off of her, and when she'd speak it was if butterflies came out of her mouth. From the outside, her life seemed perfect and maybe it is. Who in the right mind wouldn't want to be her?! But then I remembered very quickly.....

Someone in college had thought that of me once. I was immediately snapped back to a time on my university's campus when I had earned the name, "Miss America". Not everyone called me that, but a select number of people who seemed to always think my life was flawless. Most of the time I believe they were trying to be nice, but some of the time it felt as though I was being mocked out of jealousy or comparison. You see, not only was I freshly out of the US World Cup trials in equestrian - something which everyone seemed to know, but also President of my sorority, over achiever with internships and professors, had dated the President of a respected fraternity, and drove a pretty brand new red sports car. But the truth was, they couldn't see me screaming inside. And I was absolutely terrified for anyone to know the truth.

I was wracked with insecurity, fear, loneliness, a world of hurt and disappointment, this desperate need for control, terrified of abandonment, and struggling to find my self-worth (and was doing so in all the wrong places). I now look back at the girl I was and wish I could be as honest with everyone back then as I am with myself now. It's been a very long road, but one that God has paved Himself with careful and caring hands. You see, not everyone sees what's on the inside, but its easy to see the outside and think, "she has it all together" when it couldn't be further from the truth. I wish someone had pulled me aside and truly explained to me how God sees me. I wish they would have shared with me that I don't have to try so hard, that I'm accepted by a Holy God who loves me for me, and that I'm beautiful on the inside.

The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. - 1 Samuel 16:7, NIV

The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord. - Psalm 45:11, NIV

I praise the Lord for these two verses, and for using women in my life to bring them to my attention. God's word has literally saved me countless times from sleepless nights, hopelessness, desire for control, irrational thoughts, and from seeing myself as less than God's beloved daughter. It is WE who rush to look at the outside, to look at the appearance of not just people, but also situations. We see the outward appearance and think there are no problems, but the Lord looks at the heart. He sees us for all we know that we aren't. He sees our insecurities, our failures, our brokenness, our confusion, our grief, our pride, our neediness and desire for control, and He graciously covers it with His blood from the Cross. The King Himself is enthralled with your beauty. He said so Himself. No more are the days of ridiculing yourself in front of the mirror for hours on end and picking yourself apart. It is time to break-up with insecurity and accept that the King of all kings is enthralled with your beauty. He made you, and He makes no mistakes and makes all things beautiful.

I pray that the next time we see "her", the girl who outwardly appears to "have it all together", that we take a moment before we start to compare ourselves to her. Before we make judgment, before we write her off as "perfect", before we plunge into jealousy, before we find ourselves comparing ourselves with her, before we try to be her best friend for what we can get out of it, I pray we remember she is our sister in Christ whether she realizes it or not. We can know she, just like each one of us, needs the grace and healing power of Jesus Christ. She may have runs in her panty hose, forget to pay her bills from time to time, have a bad hair day, or just might have a lot of emotional scars she needs to heal from. Pull her aside, and tell her the King of Kings is enthralled with her beauty. Tell her the Lord looks at her heart and she has beauty in her heart because the Lord put it there. Tell her He loves her, and He gave up everything for her. You won't regret it, I know I have wished I had done the same.