At this past New Years Eve, I had an awesome time with an amazing group of girlfriends in Houston, Texas. Likewise, I'm also on a group text of five other women from my home church here in Washington, DC, and in both groups, we decided to come up with one or two theme verses for the next year. I chose these two verses:
Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10, NIV
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things. - Philippians 4:8, NIV
These two verses have been a consistent prayer of mine nearly every day. At times, its easier than others. Purity of heart goes further than just omitting sexual sins and debauchery. I've found that purity of heart dives into our motives, what we think about money, how we view giving and generosity, how we think about others, how we talk about others, how we think and talk about our work, how we use our time, even why and how we approach God, and the list goes on and on. All that to say, the mere verse of Psalm 51:10 has been an incredibly sanctifying verse to meditate on the last few months.
The sweet part of this verse isn't simply the request for a pure heart (in which one has to acknowledge that their heart is NOT pure first before they can request a pure heart), but also the request for God to renew a steadfast spirit within. (Some other scripture versions use the word "right" instead of "steadfast") The word "renew" is so sweet. The word "new" brings about the picture of clean, fresh start, a second chance, a new beginning, a do over, out with the old and in with the new, improved, and restore. And God certainly promises to give us a new spirit should we be humble enough to seek Him!
I also came across another verse shortly after I chose the two verses I mentioned earlier:
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. - Matthew 5:8, NIV
Undoubtedly, God counts purity of heart as a good thing, a blessed thing, and something to be desired. And no doubt, it is something we will all be working on till God calls us home. A chance to start over, a new spirit, to have a clean heart; what sweet imagery and what a relief! We no longer have to carry the sins of our past around with us, but we can hold fast to the promises of God and what was finished work on the Cross to know we can be redeemed. We can have a renewed spirit, we can seek purity in heart, we can let go of our past sins and be worthy to sit before our Holy God. Nothing else defines you except Christ Himself. Not your past sins, not your work, not your school, not your health status, not your marital status, not your economic class or how much money you make; the purity of your heart and what defines you is squarely in the hands of an Almighty God. He is the One that renews and makes all things new! What a comfort! ....and what a promise!
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! - 2 Corinthians 5:17, NIV
Coming up, I have an oncology checkup on Friday, May 20th. I was supposed to have my oncology checkup on April 8, but I forgot. Yep, I forgot. Can you believe that? I actually forgot. The significance of forgetting the appointment is rather significant to me, ha! You see, three years ago, I would have NEVER forgotten an appointment like that, nor would I have been able to forget it. It's certainly a pain to reschedule and pay for the appointment I didn't get to, but its a weird blessing in a way. My life has moved on. I became so enmeshed with living life beyond cancer that I completely didn't think about getting to my next checkup. It was an odd relief. I'm a tremendously different person today than I was a mere three years ago, and it is all by God's grace. While cancer was absolutely traumatic and painful in a multitude of ways (as chronicled earlier in this blog), I've moved on and able to heal (emotionally and physically) and appropriately let go. Sure, there are memories and rises in concern from time to time, but by God's grace, I'm still here. My heart is still beating and my lungs are still working. I'm able to have more days to serve our God and others. I'm able to have more birthdays too!
For those who have weathered this journey with me, there are not enough words of thanks but know your treasure in heaven is plenty. God surely knows. God has used you to teach me more about selfless love and pure compassion.
So on May 20th, I'll go for the usual round of CT scan, bloodwork, and oncological exam. It's all routine. And then I'll leave the cancer hospital and get on with my day! It's always sobering, as there are many who are still in the cancer hospital that are not able to get on with their day - and I could easily still be in their shoes. So today I'm grateful for the prayers of so many, and so thankful for the prayers of those who help me in seeking a pure heart and a renewed steadfast spirit. These are the things that no one can truly take away, not even Satan himself. Anything that causes us to have a deeper dependence on God is ultimately a blessing, even if it is at times painful or challenging.
Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10, NIV
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things. - Philippians 4:8, NIV
These two verses have been a consistent prayer of mine nearly every day. At times, its easier than others. Purity of heart goes further than just omitting sexual sins and debauchery. I've found that purity of heart dives into our motives, what we think about money, how we view giving and generosity, how we think about others, how we talk about others, how we think and talk about our work, how we use our time, even why and how we approach God, and the list goes on and on. All that to say, the mere verse of Psalm 51:10 has been an incredibly sanctifying verse to meditate on the last few months.
The sweet part of this verse isn't simply the request for a pure heart (in which one has to acknowledge that their heart is NOT pure first before they can request a pure heart), but also the request for God to renew a steadfast spirit within. (Some other scripture versions use the word "right" instead of "steadfast") The word "renew" is so sweet. The word "new" brings about the picture of clean, fresh start, a second chance, a new beginning, a do over, out with the old and in with the new, improved, and restore. And God certainly promises to give us a new spirit should we be humble enough to seek Him!
I also came across another verse shortly after I chose the two verses I mentioned earlier:
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. - Matthew 5:8, NIV
Undoubtedly, God counts purity of heart as a good thing, a blessed thing, and something to be desired. And no doubt, it is something we will all be working on till God calls us home. A chance to start over, a new spirit, to have a clean heart; what sweet imagery and what a relief! We no longer have to carry the sins of our past around with us, but we can hold fast to the promises of God and what was finished work on the Cross to know we can be redeemed. We can have a renewed spirit, we can seek purity in heart, we can let go of our past sins and be worthy to sit before our Holy God. Nothing else defines you except Christ Himself. Not your past sins, not your work, not your school, not your health status, not your marital status, not your economic class or how much money you make; the purity of your heart and what defines you is squarely in the hands of an Almighty God. He is the One that renews and makes all things new! What a comfort! ....and what a promise!
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! - 2 Corinthians 5:17, NIV
Coming up, I have an oncology checkup on Friday, May 20th. I was supposed to have my oncology checkup on April 8, but I forgot. Yep, I forgot. Can you believe that? I actually forgot. The significance of forgetting the appointment is rather significant to me, ha! You see, three years ago, I would have NEVER forgotten an appointment like that, nor would I have been able to forget it. It's certainly a pain to reschedule and pay for the appointment I didn't get to, but its a weird blessing in a way. My life has moved on. I became so enmeshed with living life beyond cancer that I completely didn't think about getting to my next checkup. It was an odd relief. I'm a tremendously different person today than I was a mere three years ago, and it is all by God's grace. While cancer was absolutely traumatic and painful in a multitude of ways (as chronicled earlier in this blog), I've moved on and able to heal (emotionally and physically) and appropriately let go. Sure, there are memories and rises in concern from time to time, but by God's grace, I'm still here. My heart is still beating and my lungs are still working. I'm able to have more days to serve our God and others. I'm able to have more birthdays too!
For those who have weathered this journey with me, there are not enough words of thanks but know your treasure in heaven is plenty. God surely knows. God has used you to teach me more about selfless love and pure compassion.
So on May 20th, I'll go for the usual round of CT scan, bloodwork, and oncological exam. It's all routine. And then I'll leave the cancer hospital and get on with my day! It's always sobering, as there are many who are still in the cancer hospital that are not able to get on with their day - and I could easily still be in their shoes. So today I'm grateful for the prayers of so many, and so thankful for the prayers of those who help me in seeking a pure heart and a renewed steadfast spirit. These are the things that no one can truly take away, not even Satan himself. Anything that causes us to have a deeper dependence on God is ultimately a blessing, even if it is at times painful or challenging.
I stumbled upon your video which led me to your blog. I am scheduled for my first biopsy next week... I am 35. Your video resonated with me and I hope so whole heartedly your appt last week went well. Bless you.
ReplyDelete